Your partner had a penile implant: what to expect

Lisa Welsh explains what a penile implant involves, what the different types mean for your experience together, and how to ease back into intimacy in a way that feels good for both of you.

If your partner has been through prostate cancer treatment and has had a penile implant as a result, you might be feeling a mix of things. Hopeful. Curious. Maybe a little nervous about what sex will feel like now. That’s all completely normal, and you’re not alone in wondering.

A bit of background

Erectile dysfunction is one of the most common side effects of prostate cancer treatment. Surgery, radiation, and hormone therapy can all affect the nerves and blood flow involved in erections. For many men, medication and other aids help. For others, they don’t, or they stop working over time. 

A penile implant is often considered when other options have been exhausted, and for many couples it becomes a genuine turning point. They’re internal devices, so nothing is visible from the outside. There are two main types, and it’s worth understanding the difference.

Inflatable implant

An inflatable implant is the more common option. It uses a small pump placed inside the scrotum to fill cylinders in the penis with fluid, creating an erection on demand. When you’re done, the pump is pressed again to release the fluid. The result feels quite close to a natural erection, and the whole thing is completely discreet. Your partner controls when and how long the erection lasts, which for many couples brings back a sense of spontaneity that may have been missing for a long time.

Malleable implant

A malleable implant works differently. It uses semi-rigid rods that keep the penis firm when needed. Your partner simply  bends it into position for sex and back down afterwards. It’s a simpler device with fewer moving parts, and it’s a good option for some men depending on their health and dexterity.

Neither type affects sensation, orgasm, or ejaculation. The implant addresses erection only. Everything else still works the way it did before.

What might feel different

It’s worth going in with realistic expectations, not because anything is likely to go wrong, but because knowing what to expect helps you both relax.

Some men find that the size or shape of their erections feel slightly different from before. This is normal and usually settles over time as the body adjusts to the implant. Sensation is intact, but the  erection itself may look or feel a little different to what you both remember.

There’s also an emotional adjustment. Your partner has been through surgery, recovery, and probably a fair amount of grief around his sexual function before deciding on this route. He may feel relieved, but also vulnerable. Patience matters here, from both sides.

Bringing intimacy back, together

Don’t feel like you need to dive straight into sex the moment your partner is healed. That kind of pressure, even if no one is voicing it out loud, can make the first few experiences more anxious than they need to be.

Start with closeness. Touching, kissing, just being physically near each other without any agenda. Let desire build naturally rather than treating the implant as a starting gun.

When you do feel ready, take it slowly. Talk during and after. What feels good? What do you both enjoy? Treat this as a chance to rediscover each other rather than a test to pass.

It can also help to keep a sense of humour about the learning curve. The inflatable pump, for example, takes a little practise to use smoothly. Some couples find the early attempts a bit clunky. That’s fine. It gets easier, and laughing together isn’t a bad way to reconnect.

What many couples find

Research consistently shows high satisfaction rates among both patients and their partners after penile implant surgery. Many couples describe their sex life after an implant as better than it was before the erectile dysfunction started, partly because going through a difficult time together often brings a new level of honesty and closeness.

The spontaneity that the implant restores tends to be what partners appreciate most. No planning around a tablet. No managing an injection. Just presence and connection, when you both feel ready for it.

Getting support

If you’re finding the emotional side of this harder to navigate, talking to a sex therapist who understands post-cancer intimacy can make a real difference. You don’t have to work through it all on your own.

Visit mysexualhealth.co.za to find a professional who can support you both.

Lisa Welsh is an accredited sex educator who focuses on helping people to experience more pleasure in their daily lives. She serves as the Communications Lead for My Sexual Health and the World Association for Sexual Health.

Header image by Freepik